I could write about my three workouts today -- morning run, lunchtime yoga or evening swim. The latter pushed me to the brink of nausea following some Indian-spiced lentil soup that repeated on me towards the end of one of the more grueling workouts I can remember. Instead, I'm going to focus briefly on doing something small that probably says so much more.
Finally, after three months (almost to the day), I removed my Ironman Arizona bib number sticker from my Cervelo. I was re-affixing my cleaned Speedfill bottle to the bike when I stared at the sticker and simply realized, "it's time."
I don't need the physical keepsakes to remind me of the accomplishment. And there's so much more to look forward to, like more breakthroughs in training and my upcoming races at Wildflower and Ironman Coeur d'Alene. Perhaps the only way to truly reach forward is to let go of what's behind.
I did that tonight, without fanfare (well, outside of a blog post!). Perhaps it's truly the final step in what has been a much longer recovery from an Ironman than I ever honestly expected. It's been far more of a physical and emotional roller coaster than even the original training itself. At least with Ironman training it was consistent and I had a real idea of what to expect. Even though Coach Gerardo told me that everyone recovers differently from an Ironman, I suppose I just had to experience it for myself.
But I think, with a long pause and some hesitation in my inner voice, I can close the chapter on the 2010 race season once and for all. I truly can live in the here and now.
So while it seems like it's just a sticker, to me it's something bigger.
I've finally peeled away the past.
119 days and counting.